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What Really Helps

Using Mindfulness & Compassionate Presence to Help, Support, and Encourage Others
By: ,
Contributor Role: 
By (author)
Contributor Sequence Number: 
2
Contributor name: 
Paperback Book
Publisher: 
Shambhala
 | 
December, 2010
ISBN:
9781590308806
In stock now: 
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Banyen's Description: 

Drawing on her experience as a psychotherapist and longtime student of Buddhism, Karen Wegela offers clear, practical advice on the art of helping others. Despite our good intentions to help, we often hold back because we don’t know what to say or do—and we sometimes find that our best attempts to help end up making things worse. What are the best ways to provide emotional support, guidance, or encouragement to the people in our lives?

Wegela’s core message is that in order to be truly helpful to others, we need to develop greater awareness, kindness, and compassion for ourselves. Only then we can extend these qualities to the people we’d like to help. What Really Helps highlights the use of mindfulness, or learning to become fully present in the moment. When we learn how to be fearlessly and compassionately present, we find that we are better listeners, and we are wiser about what actions to take and what guidance to give others.

Once we can be present, then we can help in many ways. Another premise of this approach is that each of us contains what has been called brilliant sanity. The contemplative approach suggests that our most basic nature is open, clear, and compassionate. Within all states of mind are the seeds of these qualities that we can offer to each other. Not only can we offer our own resources to others, we can also help other people to tap their own richness.

Here is a book that provides answers, and that will be of special interest to helping professionals—as well as to anyone who wants to make a positive difference in the lives of people they care about.

Wegela is also the author of The Courage to Be Present.

 

Publisher’s Description: 

Most of us, at one time or another, would like to help a friend, family member, or acquaintance through a challenging time. But do we really know how to give meaningful support and guidance? And why do our best efforts at helping others often come up short? Here is a practical guide that will be of special interest to helping professionalsand anyone who wants to make a positive difference in the lives of people they care about.

To be truly helpful to others, Karen Wegela explains, we must begin by focusing on ourselves. We must develop greater awareness, steadiness of mind, fearlessness, and self-compassion. Only then can we extend these qualities to the people wed like to help. Drawing on her experiences as a psychotherapist and on her longtime study of Buddhist meditation, Wegela emphasizes the benefits of mindfulness, or learning to become fully present in our moment-to-moment experience. Through mindfulness we develop a fearless, compassionate presence in our daily livesand we become better listeners, take wiser actions, and give more valuable, effective guidance to the people wed like to help.

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